Its A Write Off !
Last Sunday I believed I had made a breakthrough. I had decided to attempt to separate the working weak from the weekend and impose a regime of cash conservation and healthy living during the week so any extravagance or unhealthy treat at the weekend would be a treat. I was not deluded enough to believe actually accumulating savings would be possible, however the goal was to not acquire any more debt.
The reasoning behind this was simple enough. I believed (and still do) that previous efforts at this type of lifestyle were doomed from the start as any gains made would be wiped out by a unexpected crises. while I was living with my ex Wife there was always a unexpected crisis, so much so that they stopped being unexpected. Strangely enough the financial cost of the crisis was always about 10% more than any savings we had made, thus insuring a continual state of debt. After over twenty years of this pattern I had lost all will to attempt forward planning, nothing good ever came from it.
However, after nine months (yes people, it has now been nine months from the escape 🙂 ) even I had to admit the problems I faced tomorrow were likely to be the same ones I faced today and it was time I attempted to live on the meager resources I have left after I meet the financial obligations placed on me to keep the bailiffs away until the house is sold and the money is finally sorted out. It is after all the responsible thing to do.
I decided not to write about my plans for the weak, incase they went astray, It is so much harder to destroy all evidence you tried than not produce any in the first place !
This caused the making of a batch of tuna pasta to cover my lunches for the weak, the drinking of two liters of water a day (free and much healthier than coke a cola ! ) and the biggie, no cigarettes from monday to friday, the question was could I do it ? Monday and Tuesday were going well and I was feeling strong and pretty pleased with myself, then the bombshell. Remember how I was saying that “She” could not cause unexpected catastrophes, well on Tuesday evening she played a ace ! Right out of left field. I will write about what exactly she did, but not until the full consequences are known. For now lets just say it rectifying what could be rectified meant taking Wednesday of work and a lot of time with official people, including the Police, was expensive and blew my progress out of the water. By Thursday evening I realized somehow I was coping better than I thought possible and the support I was receiving from my Family helped a lot. This form of support is quite new due to the new closeness made possible with actually seeing them regularly. There was no question about it, the situation called for fried egg and crispy bacon toasted sandwiches
Although things were far from perfect, there was hope, and a realization I was coping better than average for the situation, and had still managed to post a poem a day, the machine works ! I have written off the effort at progress for the week in the knowledge it was scuppered by another, however that is (probably) the last thing she can do to mess with my life. All that is left is the process of selling the house and clearing of joint debts the devision of any profit. All of this is covered by a legal process and will be done fairly.
So once again I sit on a Sunday evening ready to do battle with the week, chicken pasta for lunch this week, water and electronic cigarette at the ready, its a do over, wish me luck people.
On another note, April is almost over, I would like to take this opportunity to thank you all for reading my Poem a Day, there will be less frequent poems and more commentary on my life like this, and my views on the world at large. I will also attempt to catch up on the reading I have missed over the mad week I am leaving behind.
It is unimportant how manny times you get knocked down, the important thing is how manny times you get back up, and the muscles you grow climbing back out of the pit !